Guess what, geeks? Lindsay Lohan will not be going to prison, where she would have to have endure the cuddling of her muscular lesbian cellmate, "Pudding". Rather, she will have to be checked back into rehab. Upon hearing this news, Lindsay was indignant, and kinda just hoped the court would, like, let just live her life, like damn. However, the iron fist of justice hit Lindsay with yet another stint in the rehabs, and I'm 90% certain that they will work this time.
Here's an important fact to remember, though: It costs a lot of money to keep someone in prison. Rehab, however, is dirt cheap, because all you need to do is rent a room in a church basement for a day, set up some steal folding chairs and hold a clipboard, with which you, as the psychological professional working for the government, will pretend to take notes, but will actually be drawing a shark jumping out of the water and eating a deer. You should also keep in mind that Lindsay is rich and WHITE. OH YEAH I WENT THERE.
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