I feel like we're living in a backwards, upside-down universe where the sky is green and the grass is blue, where women pursue men so that they can stick their vaginas into the men's penises, and where environmentalism is practical.
Now, there's really nothing to consider. I have to accept my Grandma as a friend on Facebook, or else I will be killed by a Colombian firing squad in some remote jungle military camp. On the plus side, they would probably give me a last request and I'd be like "Dude, you got any cocaine around here?" and they'd be like "Dude! Cocaine is everywhere. These clothes I'm wearing are made of cocaine. There is cocaine in the dirt. Just by taking a deep breath, you are sniffing a nearly-lethal amount of cocaine." and I'd be all "Sweet." and then ask to sniff some cocaine off of a secret button that plunges Colombia into the ocean. Then I'd hit the button with my nose and they'd be like "JESUS NO." as the swirling, crashing waves engulf us.
So, I'll probably stall a lot and say I haven't used Facebook in weeks, and then finally accept and then lose all my street cred.
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