Tuesday, June 19, 2012

IS KRIS KARDASHIAN A BITCH?

Yes.

According to JCG's most top-notch Bitch Experts, Kris Jenner, aka Kris Kardashian, is in fact, a bitch. The source of her bitchiness is yet to be determined, but believe me, we are allocating very few resources to figure out why celebrities have personality problems! Keep 'em coming!

BRUCE TO KRIS: "YOU ONLY CARE ABOUT MONEY."

KRIS: "BRUCE IS UGLY AND I ONLY CARE ABOUT MONEY."

KIM: "I ONLY CARE ABOUT MONEY."

KOURTNEY: "I ALSO ONLY CARE ABOUT MONEY."

BRUCE TO FAMILY: "OUR FAMILY IS RUINED!!!!"

KHLOE: "I STILL ONLY CARE ABOUT MONEY."

BRUCE, IN TEARS: "PLEASE, LET'S JUST BE A FAMILY AGAIN." 


KIM: "I ALSO CARE ABOUT PUBLICITY."


KHLOE: "YEAH, ME TOO."


KRIS: "LOL, ME THREE."


BRUCE, ON HIS KNEES, SOBBING: "COME BACK TO ME! YOU ARE TEARING ME APART LISA!"


KRIS: "WHO IS LISA!?"


BRUCE: "I MEAN KRIS."


KRIS: "I WANT A DIVORCE."


KIM: "IS THERE ANY WAY WE CAN TURN THE DIVORCE INTO A REALITY TV SHOW?"


KRIS: "YOU ARE SO BUSINESS-SAVVY... THAT'S MY GIRL!"


Meanwhile, in Syria...


hundreds gunned down in horrific gunfire... more news at 10.

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